tending tuesday: tending in the quiet times

Welcome to Tending Tuesday!

This week I want to introduce you to Debra Wallace. She is a writer who is passionate about helping women who’ve experienced husband’s same-sex addiction overcome shame and secrecy so they can pursue hope and healing. Ten years into her 22 year marriage, she became aware of her husband’s same-sex attraction and acting out through multiple same-sex affairs. She struggled to face the numbing pain of reality, riding an unending roller coaster of hope and despair. After many years of shame and secrecy, God used the power of scripture memorization to heal her heart and restore her faith. Through telling my story, she hopes to come alongside other women to share what she’s learned and show how God refines us through betrayal-trauma.

Here is how Debra tends her way by the Word…

Scripture reading and memorization is a spiritual discipline that has become a vital ingredient for my spiritual growth. With fewer interruptions, early morning quiet time works best and has become a precious, life-giving, daily sacred appointment. I’d love to share what works for me.

Beginning with prayer, I ask God to keep me free from distractions and to show me what He chooses to reveal through His Holy Spirit. My morning routine consists of reading one chapter from Proverbs and Psalms, plus two others from both the Old and New Testaments. 

For Proverbs, it’s easy to keep track of what chapter number I’m on—since the number of chapters (31) easily coincides with the days in a month. When choosing a chapter from Psalms, I read one per day in order, until all the chapters of Psalms have been read. Upon completion of the Psalm 150, I repeat them. For Old and New Testament books, I choose a book and read until it’s completed, then start the next. 

You may be thinking it’s a lot of reading, it’s not—considering the time we spend on our phones or watching a movie! Ask the Lord to supply the strength and time for what’s essential. Soon, God will change your heart to desire more of Him and His true Word. As you realize benefits, blessings, and wisdom gained, you will not want to miss a single day!

All said, legalism is not allowed. If a certain passage blesses me, I may study it further. If a Psalm is short, I may choose to read two. There are no hard-set rules. Some days time is limited—so I may choose one verse to meditate on during the whole day. I don’t give myself a guilt trip for not completing a goal, I just keep working at it!

In addition to my daily reading routine, I’ve realized scripture memorization is an added bonus!

I used to think I wasn’t good at memorizing, so why try? This is nothing but an excuse for not doing the work and a lie the enemy would love me to believe! 

I used to think I wasn’t good at memorizing, so why try? This is nothing but an excuse for not doing the work and a lie the enemy would love me to believe! 

Memorizing verses as a child, I was rewarded with a little colored star to lick and stick in a box on a chart. I’m not sure how effective it was, nor do I recall how many verses were retained. 

As an adult, teaching verses to my children for school curriculum, or to other littles while I was a BSF Children’s Leader was a habit, but believing these verses applied to me wasn’t on my radar.

Full of despair and short on hope while walking through betrayal, I needed a change of heart and belief system.

While participating in a Women’s Bible study, I was encouraged to memorize one verse every two weeks, committing 24 verses to memory in one year’s time. I chose Proverbs 31:25 NIV to begin: “I am clothed in strength and dignity. I can laugh at the days to come.”

Clothed in strength? I wasn’t strong, I was weak! Dignity? What was that? I had no dignity or self-worth left! As for laughing at the days to come? It appeared my future would be filled with tears, not laughter. This verse couldn’t apply to me, I thought. Surely this was about the Proverbs 31 Bible Study Ladies, but not me.

Feeling hopeless and helpless, I decided to give memorizing it a try anyway.

Friend, memorizing this verse and others changed my life! Initially, I didn’t believe it was true for me, but as I daily repeated it out loud, the Holy Spirit whispered these words of truth and planted them in my heart until I did believe them! He can do the same for you! 

Memorizing one verse with reference every two weeks is very do-able and a great place to start. Repeat it out loud with reference each time you eat a snack or have a meal (one way to remember to recite it at least 3 times per day).

You will be blessed by the spiritual growth and insight. I hope you give it a try. It will be a discipline you will enjoy practicing for a lifetime!

Get Debra’s freebie CLICK HERE to help as you move forward towards healing.

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Need a simple Bible Study method to help you get into the Word of God for yourself in your own quiet time? Drop your email below to get Tend: How to Hear the Gardener’s Voice in your inbox and get monthly encouragement to keep tending your way like a garden by the Word of God.

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